The Cork Board

The last time I choked…………


One of the things I’ve noticed over the years as I get older is that I am becoming more emotional….and I don’t understand. I was once known for being the coolest Dude in town. An image I relished, as you can imagine. But these days I just don’t get it. Where did all these tears come from ? It’s not so much family and friends that get the waterworks going it’s emotional joy that kicks me off.

An absolute cert to get me choking back the tears is great music and theatre or performance of any kind. What’s the trigger ? I’m sure there’s a psychological reason for this. Once in a while I get out one my Grateful Dead dvd’s, open a bottle of wine, crank up the volume, turn down the lights and twirl the night away.

The Grateful Dead

By the time I’m halfway through the second set I’m weeping like a baby.

Where did this come from? I’m not sad – I’m joyful.

I try to be cool, of course. “There’s something in my eye. Don’t worry, I’ll get it.” Quick – more wine. Sniff.

The last time I choked back the tears in public was during an Alejandro Escovedo concert in Oxford last year.

Alejandro Escovedo

His “Sister Lost Soul” about the passing of his friends over the years is a banker to move me.

My reaction to books I can control. It’s just me and the pages, and anyway, I don’t tend to read tear jerkers.

But what’s the emotional connection with music, theatre and performance ? Is it the human thing?

Am I just getting soppy?

When did you last choke back a tear because something moved you with it’s beauty?

6 thoughts on “The last time I choked…………”

  1. Yes indeed – I can relate to this, especially with regard to watching a live performance. The strangest involuntary reaction was a few years ago when I took my, then young teenage, daughters to see an Abba tribute band at the Leeds Grand Theatre. Hating both tribute bands and Abba (i’d as much spend an evening with Susan Boyle) I surprised myself by begining to weep once the opening strains of “Dancing Queen” washed into the audience. I have never recovered from the embarrassment at the recollection and, I believe, only therapy may finally heal this particular emotional wound.

  2. The last time I cried because of how beautiful something was was on my birthday in my favourite little B & B in Brighton…Me and Duncan came back from the pub and he gave me my main birthday present, a song he had written and recorded and made a little booklet of lyrics all nicely bound…It was one of the loveliest things I had ever heard and the lyrics were obviously so personal and bright…I cried…I tried not to as that’s just not the kind of thing I do, but they plip plopped out of my eyes regardless…Duncan cries at beauty a great deal…I guess he gets that from you then! x

  3. I have found, much to my chagrin, that I am increasingly moved to tears by beauty in any form, be it an amazingly written description in a book I’m reading (how can anyone write so well??)…..during concerts and musicals, if someone dances well, or sings beautifully….or plays a musical instrument with passion….and you’re right, they’re tears of utter joy!! It feels like my heart expands and chokes me up, so I’m sitting there feeling all tight and uncomfortable and my eyelids start prickling and I know the tears are about to spill over, and it’s so embarrassing!!
    I hate it. It’s just NOT cool, ok?

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